FIFA Set Election Date for February 2016 as Blatter is Showered in Dollars

By Christian Radnedge

FIFA announced on Monday that the extraordinary elective congress to elect a new president will take place on February 26, 2016, before Sepp Blatter was showered by dollar bills by a television “comedian” in the following press conference. 

Blatter was addressing the media after a special meeting of the executive committee to determine the date of electing a successor to the 79-year-old who last month announced he was to “lay down his mandate” in the wake of two corruption investigations.

But before he could speak to the assembled reporters in Zurich, a British TV “comedian” stood before Blatter and said he was from the North Korea 2026 bid team before throwing what appeared to be dollar bills over the president’s head.

Blatter left the room while organisers cleared the debris.

Once set up again, Blatter revealed that FIFA was to enter a new reform process following on from the one that began in 2011.

Speaking about his decision on June 2nd just days after winning reelection for a fifth term in office, Blatter said: “I had to do something very special and I did it. In footballing terms, I kicked the ball out of the field to stop something.

“This is what I did on 2nd of June when I say I put my mandate at the disposal [of national associations] but I am still the elected president and I speak to you as the elected president.”

The decisions taken by the executive committee included enhanced security checks for new members, term-limits and a disclosure of FIFA officials salaries. However, Blatter refused to reveal his salary when asked. 

Despite making veiled hints in recent media reports that he could stand for re-election yet again, Blatter confirmed that once and for all he would not be FIFA president following the congress in February. 

“I will not be a candidate for the election in 2016,” he said. “I have put my mandate at disposal and there will be an election for a new president, I insisted on that so we can have a new president.

“I cannot be the new president because I am the old president.”

Meanwhile, major FIFA sponsors such Coca-Cola and McDonald’s in adddition to pressure groups such as Transparency International and the International Trade Union Confederation have stepped up demands for “independent reform of FIFA led by an eminent person.”

Blatter revealed that a task-force will be set up to implement reform and will be lead by an independent chairman.

The New FIFA Now campaign group had called on former United Nations Secretary General Kofi Annan to lead the charge for change at world football’s governing body.

However, a spokesperson for the Kofi Annan Foundation appeared to pour cold water on the invitation. 

“We are aware of some discussions and speculations but in actual fact Mr Annan has not been formally approached by any side on this matter, nor does he plan to widen the scope of his already busy schedule,” Bijan Farnoudi said.